Ten Seconds To Consider http://ten2consider.com Most Conscious Acts of Consideration Take Ten Seconds or Less Wed, 27 Dec 2017 19:06:34 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.9.1 http://ten2consider.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/cropped-TS2CSmall-2-32x32.png Ten Seconds To Consider http://ten2consider.com 32 32 Las Vegas – When There Was No Time To Consider http://ten2consider.com/2017/10/10/las-vegas-consideration/ http://ten2consider.com/2017/10/10/las-vegas-consideration/#comments Tue, 10 Oct 2017 21:19:09 +0000 http://ten2consider.com/?p=1309 When the shooting in Las Vegas started, taking Ten Seconds To Consider was not an option. 1st responders, Heros, Loved Ones, Performers, Security, Music Lovers of all races, genders, ages, and yes, political persuasions - all were robbed of any opportunity to deliberate; to plan; to act out of choice. They could simply react. Or paralyzed by fear and shock, do nothing. Or fall dead or injured. But yet, there were many individuals who, by Grace and election, possessed the wherewithal to move - to get to their feet and move in the direction of victims and away from possible safety...]]>

Las Vegas – When There Was No Time To Consider

When the shooting in Las Vegas started, taking Ten Seconds To Consider was not an option.

1st responders, Heros, Loved Ones, Performers, Security, Music Lovers of all races, genders, ages, and yes, political persuasions – all were robbed of any opportunity to deliberate; to plan; to act out of choice. They were robbed of any chance to consider what might be best for themselves, those close to them, or any of the 22,000 music goers with them on that beautiful evening in the grass together.

They could simply react. Or paralyzed by fear and shock, do nothing. Or fall dead or injured.1

From the first cracks of rifle shots echoing off of the buildings around them, could anyone actually distinguish them from the whacks of the band’s snare drum coming from concert-sized walls of speakers? Or maybe they were just pyrotechnics? One wouldn’t even consider the sound to be someone shooting-to-kill the friend next to you, much less an all-out attack on the entire audience.

But yet, there were many individuals who, by Grace and election, possessed the wherewithal to move – to get to their feet and move in the direction of victims and away from possible safety.

So many stories of non-discriminatory acts of kindness, service – of selfless sacrifice!

How could these champions simply throw themselves over another person to become their human shield? We can never know until we’ve done it, I suppose.

Those that have performed this miracle for someone are welcome and appreciated to comment on this, if they’re comfortable in doing so …

What’s emerged from this heart-rendering event in Las Vegas is the direly needed relief of a portrait of many spontaneous acts of heroism. We thank God for those who either just had a clear head to react or who had been trained for this sort of thing. But who can ever be ready for this level of sudden carnage except the most seasoned of combat veterans? 

Studies have been done to try and explain this seemingly spontaneous reaction to crisis.

According to a Yale study of Carnegie Hero Medal Recipients (CHMR), the recipients explained that when they acted to help, “…the cognitive processes they describe are overwhelming(ly) intuitive, automatic and fast.”

The researchers stated that the study suggests that extreme altruism may be a result of internalizing (and subsequently overgeneralizing) successful behavioral strategies from lower-stakes settings where cooperation is typically advantageous: helping others is usually in one’s long-term self-interest in the context of most daily-life interactions with friends, family members and co-workers. This leads to the development of helping as an automatic default, which then sometimes gets applied in atypical settings where helping is extreme costly, such as the CHMR scenarios.” (author’s emphasis in bold)

In my own interpretation of this, it is the building up of the reactionary muscles that come from both prior similar experience and the consideration of possible scenarios of this sort.

I remember an incident a number of years back where I found myself running down the middle of the street toward a personal tragedy thinking over and over, “This can’t be real! This isn’t really real!” When we had received the emergency phone call for help from a family member down the street, I took off out the door running with virtually no consideration other than just to get going because help was needed.

“…empathy is what you feel only when you can step outside of yourself and enter the internal world of the other person.” – Douglas LaBier, Ph.D.

From an interesting article at Psychology Today, Psychologist Dr. Douglas LaBier Ph.D.writes in his article on empathy:

“Sometimes, a person’s sudden awakening of interconnection (to others) jump-starts their empathy. At such times, people automatically respond from the heart.” “When empathy is aroused, you let go of your usual attachment to yourself and you want to help; connect in some way.

“… research also shows that your brain is capable of being trained and physically modified through conscious practices. This is known as neuroplasticity. You can “grow” specific emotions and create new brain patterns that reinforce them.

“… What’s more, changing your brain activity reinforces the changes you’re making in your thoughts and emotions. The result is a self-reinforcing loop between your conscious attitudes, your behavior and your brain activity.

“This may sound like science fiction, yet such studies show that you can learn to “reprogram” your brain. In effect, what you think and feel is what you become. And it means you can learn to grow empathy.“

So, while thankfully, there are among us individuals who have an innate response to an emergency, it’s clear that the rest of us can gain at least a modicum of automatic response for when and if the time comes.

That said, there cannot even be a hint of shame or accusation of cowardice for those who simply responded by trying to get themselves and others close to them to safety. Because that’s what the shooter set out to orchestrate. He certainly accomplished this despicable goal – to remove any chance of defensive reaction.

I am called to also consider it a noble act to save oneself for the others who may depend on you for their lives, outside of the immediate situation. Bottom line: there should be no judgement on these types of difficult choices.

And sometimes, all we can do is simply hold on to each other. This might be our only shield of humanity against such an inhumane assault.

It brings tears to my eyes just reading through the accounts of that Sunday night – especially of the loved ones who lost their lives saving others, as well as those whose loved ones were taken from them through sickening violence.

~~~

There’s an army rising up, though.

With the relatively recent tragedies of the Twin Towers attack and even back to the Oklahoma City bombing, there are among us more and more individuals who have been awoken to the idea of preparedness for these terrible times.

No, I’m not talking about a fortified shack in the woods.

I’m thinking of how, through increased media-communicated exposure to these heroes, there are men, women, and youth who have chosen to rise up against our natural responses to either fight or flight. It’s the same with natural disasters, Katrina, earthquakes, etc.

People all over the world are considering, maybe for the first time, of stepping outside of themselves to assist others. Yes, we see in the news many instances of onlookers… well, being onlookers… during an emergency or violent attack instead of coming to the aid of a victim. But I believe we are witnessing an insurgence against apathy and inaction in crisis. I believe that along with the increased self-centeredness of our digital distraction there is a corresponding rise in “otherness”. Grace, mercy, and sacrifice are finding a home in our hearts and minds.

It’s not as dour an outlook as we might be led to believe. Most importantly, there are increasing outlets of support and encouragement for acts of kindness; opportunities to serve others; and an upsurge in faith-based experience that truly uplifts and informs in service to the poor and broken and afflicted.

All of this encourages us to step out of our personal agendas and comfort zones to experience the undeniable satisfaction of serving and sacrifice to others in some way.

I believe that it is not only possible for everyone to perform Conscious Acts of Consideration, but that through the Mechanics of Consideration, mindfulness can be learned and made spontaneous.

Through this blog and upcoming book, I will outline the Mechanics of Consideration and how it builds our kindness, perception, cognitive, creative, empathetic, and innovative muscles.

Here at TenSecondsToConsider, my goal is to help us, in some small way, to become considerate heroes in our daily lives.

In the meantime, may God bring peace and mercy to those inflicted with wounds that will be with them for a long time and through Grace, may they find their way to a better life through this horrific tragedy.

 

1. It’s with a heavy heart that I have this subject to write about so early into my blog life. Just to plumb my own thoughts and reactions to this horror, I am listening to as inspirational and uplifting music as I can find. My personal favorite is contemporary Christian worship and praise music. What do you listen to that lifts your spirit?


This is what Consideration is all about – momentarily interrupting your routine flow of activity to really look at a situation or person as they really are. To experience that person; to cultivate empathy; to grow in understanding of your world and your place in it and to improve it. As the Special Forces would call it, becoming mindful or having Situational Awareness of your environment at any given moment not only protects you, it can enrich your life and others’ lives in ways you may not have believed.

That’s what this blog and these articles and posts are about – the premise that most Conscious Acts of Consideration take Ten Seconds or Less to instigate and/or carry out.

For now I leave it to you: How have you experienced Conscious Acts of Consideration? Have you stopped to consider something ending in a positive result? Please share those stories with me!

I also would appreciate to no end your considerate liking, following, and sharing of my Ten2Consider Facebook, Blog, and Twitter feeds.

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The Inaugural Post – My (Bike) Path to Consideration http://ten2consider.com/2017/09/14/path-to-consideration/ http://ten2consider.com/2017/09/14/path-to-consideration/#respond Thu, 14 Sep 2017 18:27:15 +0000 http://ten2consider.com/?p=996 It was just the other day that I was biking down the bike lane as fast as I could go... In my path ahead, though, was some bulky item, seen as a silhouette before the rising morning sun. As I got closer – fast – I realized it was someone pushing a way loaded shopping cart in the bike lane.]]>

My (Bike) Path to Consideration

This is the Inaugural Post for TenSecondsToConsider.

Welcome to TenSecondsToConsider, a blog and future book based on the premise that most Conscious Acts of Consideration take Ten Seconds or Less to conceive, initiate, and/or accomplish.

I make a distinction between Acts of Kindness and Conscious Acts of Consideration because while being kind is certainly a basic and essential part of human decency – and welcome as such – I believe that being Considerate takes Kindness to a different level; comes from a different place; and goes toward a more developed facility to be kind in kind. That is to say, Consideration aims to be locally appropriate to the object of consideration.

Today I want to relate a recent experience where I almost failed in my own mission to become a more considerate person.

In future posts, I will not hold back even in the instances where I fail to act on something I’ve identified through consideration. 

Now, on to the story…

~~~

My (Bike) Path to Consideration

It was just the other day that I was biking down the bike lane as fast as I could go, watching for opening car doors parked along the street, sweating, determined to get to the dedicated bike and pedestrian path that leads to Burbank, California from North Hollywood as fast as I could.

In my path ahead, though, was some bulky item, seen as a silhouette before the rising morning sun. As I got closer – fast – I realized it was someone pushing a way loaded shopping cart1 in the bike lane.

Crisis! I’m going fast, the last traffic light has unleashed a swarm of cars behind me rushing to work, and I can’t get into the traffic lane fast enough to get around the cart before I’m overtaken.

Gotta slow down. Only choice. Not happy. Not on my agenda. Plus! We’re just about to go under the 170 overpass where big RV’s park like it’s a KOA Campground and there are unsavory people there, not to mention bad smells from no facilities. Yuk!

So I slow down and come to almost a standstill behind the person struggling with the shopping cart barge. I realize it’s a woman. And that, because of my own made-up moral/value system, takes my thoughts to a different stance.

She begins to try to move the cart over behind a car in the parking lane. I call out to her to say that it’s okay, I can go around and that she’s fine where she is.

I get a break in the traffic lane and I move to go around her and as I’m passing, I look toward her and she smiles an apology for interrupting my flow. I give her a thankful smile and make a moment of eye contact as I pass forward.

So now I’m back on my path; on my mission and my agenda. But something’s nagging at me. I review that in that moment of eye contact, I saw the spark of life  – of cognizance – in the woman’s eyes. I also registered vulnerability, despite her offering a smile through those eyes.

Then I begin to consider – which is to say that I think about her rather than my own itinerary. I’m still pedaling forward, but more slowly. In less than Ten Seconds, I play out the “what if” of continuing on my way:

If I keep going, I could just offer up a prayer for her and that would be good. I don’t want to get involved in any weird energies. I’m on my bike and so what offer of real help could I be? BUT! How would I write this up for a blog post?

So right up front, I will shamefully admit that a small portion of my decision to turn around and go back was from a desire to alleviate the shame of not going back to offer something and for a good blog post. But that smile…

Returning, I choose to stop well in front of the last RV that’s at the end of the overpass so that when the woman passes the RV she won’t be startled to find me there. And she does make it around the RV and there I am, a disarming smile ready along with a five-dollar-bill in folded into my hand I’ve made ready.

I say “Hi” and ask if she could use some breakfast. She’s confused by this question and answer’s No, she doesn’t need breakfast. I offer the $5 anyway and she thankfully takes it. She says thank you to me again. I think to ask her name, finally. She is Tanika and she shakes my extended hand.

I say I wish I could do more and ask if I can at least pray for her and she appreciatively says, “Yes.”

I place one of my hands on her shoulder, keeping my bike steady between my legs with the other and we bow our heads (haven’t bothered to actually get off my bike!). I pray for her – sincerely but not too long; I try to cover her immediate and future needs. I squeeze her shoulder as we end with “Amen!” together.

I hear a voice from the sidewalk and turn to see a younger man trailing a large black suitcase. He’s said a hearty, “Amen!” also.

Surprised, even though I noted a man on the sidewalk as I rode past initially, I ask if the two of them are hanging out together. They both say yes. I ask his name. He is Marquel (I have him spell it because I haven’t encountered that name before).

Marquel offers, “We’re going (somewhere, didn’t catch it) because I’ve been approved for section 8 housing.”

I look to Tanika and she nods, still smiling at me. “That’s fantastic!”, I say, even though I don’t really know what that means. There’s a bit more conversation about that, but I can’t recall it exactly.

I apologize to both of them that I can’t do more as I’m on my way on my bike and all. I really don’t know what the heck I’m saying, to be honest. I’m not good at this.

Then Marquel says, “We just really appreciate that you stopped and acknowledged us. It really means a lot and we can always take any prayers you can offer.”

Hearing this is something I’ve either never heard; never put myself into the situation to hear it; or never imagined I’d hear from a homeless person. So it blows my mind that something I’ve done has been appropriate, appreciated, and acknowledged. All of a sudden I feel love for these two, Tanika and Marquel. (It now reminds me of how prejudice prevails as well as how it is dispelled – something for a future post.)

With a “God bless you.”, I speak their names again and they bid me farewell as I continue down the bike lane, Tanika and Marquel with a wave to me.

I ride away, picking up speed, reciting their names a number of times in case I see them again (hoping I don’t, because that means…). I pray more for them and give thanks for this encounter. And I give thanks for a chance to exercise my Gift of Helps and for a better blog post.

All because I took TenSecondsToConsider.

 


Author’s Note: How many times have I written the intro, thrust, and point to this inaugural post? How many attempts at a title? I suspect I am  discovering the Art of the Blog.

This is what Consideration is all about – momentarily interrupting your routine flow of activity to really look at a situation or person as they really are. To experience that person; to cultivate empathy; to grow in understanding of your world and your place in it and to improve it. As the Special Forces would call it, Situational Awareness. They say that becoming Mindful of your environment at any given moment not only protects you, it can enrich your life and others’ lives in ways you may not have believed.

Not every consideration leads to action; not every action leads to change; but every consideration leads to an expanding mindfulness. That’s a good thing.

That’s what this blog and these articles and posts are about – the premise that most Acts of Consideration take Ten Seconds or Less out of our lives to instigate and/or carry out.

For now I leave it to you: How have you experienced Conscious Acts of Consideration? Have you paused to Consider something that ended in a positive result? Please share those stories with me!

I also would appreciate your considerate Liking, Following, and Sharing of my Ten2Consider Facebook, Blog, and Twitter feeds.

1 Check out my shopping cart post I wrote after this!
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What’s With That Shopping Cart? http://ten2consider.com/2017/09/12/shopping-cart-consideration/ http://ten2consider.com/2017/09/12/shopping-cart-consideration/#comments Tue, 12 Sep 2017 04:51:08 +0000 http://ten2consider.com/?p=1 Raise your hand if you’ve recently left your shopping cart in front of, or next to your car - or just anywhere, instead of returning it to the Cart Corral. Maybe none of us reading this has ever done this. Or maybe just once?]]>

Raise your hand if you’ve recently left your shopping cart in front of, or next to your car – or just anywhere, instead of returning it to the Cart Corral. Maybe none of us reading this has ever done this. Or maybe just once?

Yes, that’s correct, I’m choosing to write my second blog about… Shopping carts. But this shopping cart inconsideration is emblematic of a growing lack of considerate behavior in our society. And I have some ideas on some of the causes of this breakdown in consideration. I’ll get to that in future posts along with recommendations on how any of us can build up our Consideration Muscles through the Mechanics of Consideration and counter the great Debilitating Distraction of our time.

If we stopped to consider the act of returning a shopping cart to the cart corral, there are always at least two parts to this act of consideration (or inconsideration):

  1. We have an excuse. 
    • It’s hot
    • You’re tired
    • It’s cold
    • The kids are screaming
    • Can’t leave the kids in the car alone
    • Your Achilles is killing you
    • It’s waaaaay over there
    • The car’s running and you don’t want to waste gas
    • You’re late
    • Don’t want the ice cream to melt
    • It justify’s the cart-roundup-person’s job and keeps them employed, or…
    • You just plain can’t be bothered
    • Add your own…
  1. There’s no one else who will be affected
    • We either don’t consciously consider anything outside or past our own convenience or immediate goal…
      • “It won’t hurt anyone…” justification
    • We consciously decide that no one else will be bothered by our leaving the cart just where we left it, or…
    • We feel it’s just not a big deal.

Excuses, excuses. Now, returning a shopping cart to it’s place is so pedestrian that not many of us would consider it as a Random Act of Kindness or even a Pay it Forward moment.

So, why wouldn’t we choose to bring the cart back? Any of the excuses made can be mitigated by the simple fact that it would take, literally, Ten Seconds or Less to take that cart back. Walk it out – ten seconds or less. Woe be to us if we don’t have ten seconds in our life to do something – anything.

Consider This: There are a few people who might be affected whether or not you take those ten seconds to bring your cart back. That young or older woman or man who’s pushing that long line of carts through the crowded and busy parking lot might be affected. Probably a lot of pressure on them to get back in and bag or stock. It’s hot. They’re tired. It’s cold. Their Achilles Heel may be killing them. Sound familiar? But let’s make them go to all corners of the lot to round up those carts. Good workout for them, hey?

And that cart you leave waaaay over there where you had to park and walk all that distance to the store? It’s also a very convenient place to be nabbed by someone who may need to carry around their belongings in it. Maybe they really need it anyway, right? But what about the store manager who’s got a responsibility to reign in costs because the hourly rate of employees just went up and those carts are expensive? Now she’s gotta buy more new shopping carts out of her dwindling budget.

Other shoppers like yourself might care. Have you ever tried to pull into a spot where someone’s left the cart in the middle or just where your right front fender would go? If so, you’re probably someone who returns your cart every time. But gosh, look at all those carts so carelessly left all over the lot in the spots you’d like to park! Who’s doing this? There are just too many cart abandonments to believe that the same people who are leaving their carts wherever they want don’t also experience the inconvenience of it. And vice versa.

So many carts, so little time. What about those carts that when first left were stationary, but then chose to make a run for it and ended up cracking your back taillight? Or how about the carts that are up over the front curb with two wheels right next to your car and to back out, you’re going to have to get the cart off the curb without it banging into your front fender?  This also begs the question: Are you going to leave it where it is because you didn’t leave it there in the first place?

To my own chagrin, I HAVE DONE THIS, MYSELF!

Side Note: I have this rule of thumb that I’ve also imposed on my wife that says if you pick anything up off the sidewalk or street to take a look at, you cannot put it back down and leave it. It must be carried off with you to later put in the trash. End Note.

In a large and busy parking lot, this can be a huge problem.

I want you to have a good parking space. I don’t want you to have your car damaged by a cart I left unattended or ignored. I want the store manager to make her budget. I want carts to be available to other shoppers when it’s busy. I don’t want those employees to have to work harder because I couldn’t be bothered to take Ten Seconds To Consider how my actions might affect others and my environment.

This is what Consideration is all about – momentarily interrupting your routine flow of activity to really look at a situation or person as they really are. To experience that person; to cultivate empathy; to grow in understanding of your world and your place in it and to improve it. As the Special Forces would call it, becoming mindful or having Situational Awareness of your environment at any given moment not only protects you, it can enrich your life and others’ lives in ways you may not have believed.

That’s what this blog and these articles and posts are about – the premise that most Acts of Consideration take Ten Seconds or Less to instigate and/or carry out.

For now I leave it to you: How have you experienced Conscious Acts of Consideration? Have you stopped to Consider something ending in a positive result? Please share those stories with me!

I would appreciate to no end your considerate Liking, Following, and Sharing of my Ten2Consider Facebook, Blog, and Twitter feeds. Thanks! ~ Daniel J Klein

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Calling All Conscious Acts of Consideration! http://ten2consider.com/2017/09/10/calling-all-consideration/ http://ten2consider.com/2017/09/10/calling-all-consideration/#respond Sun, 10 Sep 2017 09:59:25 +0000 https://demo.themegrill.com/flash-default-2/?p=56 Coming Soon! We're calling all Conscious Acts of Consideration! We want to hear from you - your encounters and experiences when you've actually interrupted your routine to consciously consider someone or something in a way that benefitted that person or project. ]]>

We’re calling all Conscious Acts of Consideration! We want to hear from you – your encounters and experiences when you’ve actually interrupted your routine to consciously consider someone or something in a way that benefitted that person or project. Not just a “random act of kindness”, but mindfully analyzing – however quickly or thoroughly –  if there was a way to improve someone’s life or improve upon a system.

Share Your Story Here!

We also want to hear about when others have consciously considered you and your needs in the moment or long-range.

Tell how long, approximately, it took to conceive or come up with a plan of action and how long it took to complete. What were the benefits to the considerer and to the consideree? (Yeah, spellcheck didn’t like my new words!)

We’ll then share them with the world (only with your permission, of course) so that others can begin flexing their own Consideration Muscles along with a guide on the Mechanics of Consideration.

This is going to be fun and way informative. I’ll be along for the ride as much as anyone else.

Stay tuned and thanks for reading!

~ ts2c

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Does Your Device Own You? http://ten2consider.com/2017/08/25/receipe-for-food-lover/ http://ten2consider.com/2017/08/25/receipe-for-food-lover/#respond Fri, 25 Aug 2017 10:01:21 +0000 https://demo.themegrill.com/flash-default-2/?p=60 Coming Soon! An article about Getting Our Heads Out of Our Devices. We'll take a look at Steve Jobs' original vision for smartphones in general and the Apple iPhone in particular. Guaranteed to give you license for taking a break from the preeminent Debilitating Distraction of our time!]]>

Coming Soon! An article about Getting Our Heads Out of Our Devices. We’ll take a look at Steve Jobs’ original vision for smartphones in general and the Apple iPhone in particular. Guaranteed to give you license for taking a break from the preeminent Debilitating Distraction of our time!

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